FAQs and FRCs
Frequently Asked Questions and Frequently Received Complaints
If you have a question that's not listed here feel free to e-mail me and ask!
FAQs
Do you update the page? How often?
Did you find all those bloopers yourself?!
What are Spoofs? Bloopers? Parodies?
What's a messagboard?
LOTR Spoofs has a messageboard?!
If I link you, will you link me?
Who's this Figwit dude I hear so much about?
u r soo kool!!1 wut kind uv stuff do u liek?
How did you make your site?
Can you help me with my site?
How do you get visitors to your site?
FRCs
You shouldn't pick on *insert character name here* so much!!
You need to add more spoofs!
You didn't add my thing!
You need to update more often!
Your site sucks!
FAQs - Frequently Asked Questions
- Do you update the page?
Well duh....those blabberings with dates next to them on the main page aren't just there for fun. Perhaps if you tried reading them?- Okay okay, so you update...how often?
Well....err, usually about once a week or so, though sometimes it's more or less often depending on how busy I am and how much stuff I have to put up. - Why are the titles of your updates so weird?
Most of the time the titles of the updates are quotes from something. I usually try to pick something that seems arbitrary but will be funny to those who know where it's from. Whether it be an internet cartoon, a movie, or a book. If you ever are consumed with curiosity and want to know what one is from, feel free to ask me.
The rest of the time, the title actually refers to what the post is about. For instance - "Caption Update" or "Merry Christmas." - So then, what are the titles from?
Gotta make it difficult huh?
- 3/18/04 - You can't have strawberries without bananas... - from Veggie Tales
- 3/29/04 - Muffin! Just Muffin! - from the subtitled version of Trigun
- 4/6/04 - Hi floor! Make me a sandwich! - from Invader Zim
- 4/16/04 - Magister Mundi sum. - Latin for "I am the master of the universe"
- 5/10/04 - Fear the Squirrely Wrath! - from Foamy of IllWillPress.com
- 5/17/04 - Everyone's got a water buffalo... - from Veggie Tales
- 6/1/04 - Ni... - from Monty Python
- 6/7/04 - Papa Lapped a Pap Lopped - title of a song by Camui Gackt
- 6/18/04 - Inconcievable! - from The Princess Bride
- 6/28/04 - Second star to the right and straight on till morning... - from Peter Pan
- 6/29/04 - Let’s run. If we run, we go to more places. - from Bagenders
- 7/7/04 - To infinity...and beyond!! - from Toy Story
- 8/3/04 - Is there anything on this menu that's not swimming in gravy?! - from The Emperor's New Groove
- 8/8/04 - Lagunculae leydianae non accedunt - Latin for 'batteries not included'
- 8/14/04 - But why is the rum gone?? - from Pirates of the Caribbean
- 9/8/04 - Are you pondering what I'm pondering? - from Pinky and the Brain
- 10/9/04 - Furnulum pani nolo - Latin for "I don't want a toaster"
- 11/12/04 - Woman, where's my supersuit?! - from The Incredibles
- 11/20/04 - Dance with me Lampy! - from Larry Boy
- 12/11/04 - You see at the end of this wormhole lies... A ROOM WITH A MOOSE!!!! - from Invader Zim
- 12/25/04 - God bless us, everyone! - from The Christmas Carol
- 3/20/05 - Postatem obscuri lateris nescitis - Latin for "you do not know the power of the dark side"
- 4/15/05 - Llama llama duck... - from an annoying flash movie "The Llama Song"
- 4/28/05 - And shepherds we shall be... - from The Boondock Saints
- 5/5/05 - Computer! Take me to the weasels! - from Invader Zim
- 5/16/05 - 42 - from The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy
- 6/28/05 - Savvy? - from Pirates of the Caribbean
- 7/30/05 - Klaatu barada nikto - from The Day the Earth Stood Still
- 11/5/05 - Run! it's the Curry of Life! - from Naruto
- 12/5/05 - And then they made me their chief... - from Pirates of the Caribbean
- 1/29/06 - We are philosophers, we think therefore we am. - from Pyramids
- 3/1/06 - Walla Walla Bing Bang - from FF7 spoof movie "Mr.Fluffy"
- 3/30/06 - Mae bywell yn fy mhen i! - Welsh for "there's an axe in my head!"
- 4/13/06 - I see you have a window sheet. - from Aladdin and the Cave of Cheeseburgers
- 5/1/06 - The plug thing.... it's not plugged! - from Invader Zim
- 5/15/06 - I'll just have to find myself a new giant... - from The Princess Bride
- 6/25/06 - My name is Trevor, I'm a vampire and - from Strongbad's E-mails
- 7/10/06 - Capture the b34r - from Megatokyo.com
- 7/20/06 - Make sure to get all the goats into the blender - from AskANinja.com
- 8/8/06 - May I take your trident sir? - from Dirty Rotten Scoundrels
- 8/29/06 - Wild Watermelon, Midnight Blue, Atomic Tangerine... - from Lemon Demon's Crayola song
- 9/15/06 - Wotcha! - not from anything
- 10/3/06 - HWÆT?! - Old English version of "what?!"
- 10/20/06 - "Abandon the search for Truth; settle for a good fantasy" - quote found on the net, source unknown
- 12/23/06 - Socks wi'oot feets? - from Wintersmith by Terry Pratchett
- 1/9/07 - Narf. Poit. Egad. Hark? - from Pinky and the Brain
- 2/6/07 - Time can bifurcate like a pair of trousers - from Guards! Guards! by Terry Pratchett
- 3/29/07 - whorl. Help! I'm caught in a time - by Darren Aronofsky and Ari Handel from Wired Magazine's short stories in 5 words
- 5/22/07 - Dopefish Lives - long running joke with Apogee software. Dopefish is one of the enemies in Commander Keen 4 and has since appeared over and over again in various other games.
- 6/5/07 - "Gentlemen, I wash my hands of this weirdness" - said by Captain Jack in Pirates of the Caribbean 3
- 6/25/07 - "I'm not a malefactor, I'm a lagomorph." - said by Max in the Lucasarts game Sam and Max Hit the Road (excellent game)
- 8/5/07 - Ergo caput tuum in ano est - Latin for "therefore, your head is up your butt"
- 8/29/07 - There once was a man from Nantucket.. - stereotypical beginning to a limerick
- 10/9/07 - Elevenses? Luncheon? Afternoon tea? Dinner? Supper? - quote from FOTR
- 11/14/07 - Klahowya - chinook word meaning "hello"
- 2/23/08 - Remove wrenched ankle - quote from the classic game "Operation"
- Did you find all those bloopers yourself!?
As I said on the main blooper page...you may recall... I did not find all these myself, these were taken off of blooper sites and/or submitted to me by people who spotted them. Out of all of them I think I only spotted about two myself. - What's a Spoof? What's a parody? A Blooper?
Spoof = a picture/movie/writing etc. making fun of something in particular. Thumb Wars = Star Wars Spoof | Robin Hood Men in Tights = Robin Hood Spoof etc.
Parody = a movie/writing making fun of something in particular or in general while paralleling the main story. Ex FOTR in 30 mins = FOTR parody, it follows the same story, has the same characters, but it's funny.
Blooper = unintentional mess-up in a film. Ex. An orc that is "dead" moves. I say unintentional because some movies have things that aren't supposed to be there that are intentional, usually called "Easter Eggs". Ex. In Star Wars there is a scene where one of the Storm Troopers has a smiley on his helmet, it was intentional, but technically wasn't supposed to be there. - What is this Messageboard thingie?
A messageboard (sometimes called an "MB", "forums" or "boards") is a place where you can talk to me and other members of the site. Think if it kind of like a slow motion chat, or even kinda like e-mailing. You write your message, post it, and then people read it and respond. Many times messageboards are just used to chat about random stuff and play games like "guess the quote" or "word-association".
- Is it hard to do?
Nope, takes a little getting used to at first but once you get the hang of it it's addicting. (provided you survive the initiation ritual...) - How do I sign up?
Well you have to have an account which you can get by going to the Messageboard and clicking the "register my free account" link near the top of the board. It doesn't cost anything or take long at all. Once you've signed over your soul and first born child, you can post away!
- Is it hard to do?
- Messageboard? Wha?
Ahem...yes... we haven't exactly had a whole lot of luck with this, mainly because people don't know it exists...
We do indeed have a messageboard, there is a link located in the menu on every page. Did I mention we have a messageboard?
- Why should I post on your "messageboard" anyway?
Well, if you have: questions, suggestions, comments, wanna rant, or are just bored to death... go ahead and post.
- Why should I post on your "messageboard" anyway?
- Will you link me if I link you?
If you link me and send me a link to your site I will definitely check it out, but no, I won't link you just because you linked me, I have to like your site first and I can't guarantee that I will. I don't do pity linking, so don't try and guilt me into it. - Who's this Figwit dude I hear so much about?
Okay Figwit is one of the elves seen at the Council of Elrond in FOTR the movie. He is not a character in the books and no, Figwit isn't really his name. Figwit is short for Frodo Is Grea.. Who Is THAT? To find out more about Figwit go to Figwit Lives!. To find out about Bret McKenzie the actor who played him, go to Let's Bret it on!. - u r sooo kool!!1 wut kind uv stuff do u liek?
....not that I mind answering people's questions or anything, but my e-mail inbox gets full enough as it is. If you have non-site related questions like this, feel free to ask on the messageboard. - How did you make your website?
The site is all hand coded using HTML, CSS, and a smidgen of JavaScript. I did NOT use an HTML generator or a PageMaker... I despise those things. - Can you help me with my page?
If you have a simple HTML question I'll answer it if I can, but if your page is made with a generator, then no sorry. I don't know anything about page generators and I can't fix what they've screwed up, sorry. - How do you get visitors to your site?
Well, a good way to attract visitors is to have an eye-friendly site... not some of the ones I've seen that makes you want to scream in terror and claw your eyes out of their sockets. So - get a nice color scheme and stick with it for all the pages, stick with the same general layout for all the pages (it makes things easier to find) and for heavens sake DON'T tile a picture as your page background, it's tacky and makes things hard to read. Almost as bad as tiling a pic as your background is having background MUSIC... don't... just don't. It annoys the heck out of most people especially when it can't be turned off. A lot of people listen to music while they're browsing the internet, and there's nothing more annoying than to have your music overridden by an ear-piercing "hobbit theme" in MIDI format. *shudder*
As far as publicity... if you use HTML, put in META tags, it helps search engines find your site easier. Having your own domain name (www.lotrspoofs.net) and NO POPUPS really really helps increase traffic to the site. (this of course means you have to pay for your site)
Other than that the only publicity I get is from sites who link me (I would like to add that I did NOT go to a bunch of sites and ask them to link me, almost all of them linked voluntarily) and the Middle Earth Top 100. That's it really.
FRCs - Frequently Received Complaints
- You make fun of Frodo/Legolas/Pippin/Other random character too much! Why do you pick on him???
Look, some characters are just easy to make fun of... it's not my fault Haldir has a big nose, or Legolas is poncy, or Aragorn is greasy. If I get sent a spoof, I don't care who it's making fun of, if it's funny it goes on the site. Everyone is fair game. - You need to put up more Spoofs!
Sadly I'm not an endless supply of humor. I can't come up with all that many on my own and any other spoofs that go up are either sent to me or I find on the net. The ones I find I have to find/e-mail the author and ask permission, wait sometimes weeks for a reply, create a thumbnail, resize and rename the pic, upload it, and then edit the webpage (which is more of a pain than it looks). So getting spoof pics is a slow process. Besides that, I don't exactly have ginormous amounts of time on my hands to go looking around the net for pics. If you want to see more spoof pics, Google is a wonderful thing. - You didn't put up what I sent you!
No? Tough luck :p
Seriously... if I don't find it funny, or if I find it offensive, or if I think it might be offensive to a large amount of my visitors, I don't put it up. I usually e-mail people back if they send me something for the site that I decide not to put up and give them a reason and another site to try sending it to, I'm not that evil, really. - You don't update enough!
Again, tough luck. I have a life, and as much as I'd like to be able to add new things to the site every few days, I just don't have time. I maintain another website other than this one, I moderate in a very busy chatroom, and I post on four messageboards, and that's just my internet life, I also have a real life in which is a dog that needs to be walked, a job that needs to be worked, a University that needs attending (and a GPA to keep up), a family that I like to spend time with, and friends that like to see me occasionally. So, yeah, I do my best... I try not to let too much time go by between updates but sometimes it's unavoidable. - Your site sucks! I hate it! It's ugly/not funny/stupid/etc!
Oh I'm hurt...really...that tore to the very core of my soul...I think I'll go jump off a bridge now because my life is so meaningless.
Get real. Site sucks? Cry me a river. I will gratefully accept any constructive criticism, I know the site isn't perfect, but spare me your petty insults oh thou of the tiny vocabulary. If you must insult me... do it well and use big words. Preferably, be amusing as well...
Oh yeah... and SPELL your insults correctly. Bad spelling is demonstrative of a tiny brain and the inability to use a spell checker/dictionary properly
people were good enough to read this far... - Okay okay, so you update...how often?